Most  of us have been in a situation where they saw, perhaps sitting across the room someone they immediately felt an a strong inclination to meet, talk to and even love. However, they were bogged down by overwhelming fear and anxiety and instead grew cold turkey; too nervous to go over and start a chat.

Underlying this nervousness is the closely following immolating feelings of self  indictment and gushing negations driven by dominant thoughts; to the contrary persuading you that you don’t deserve that kind of person who probably you might be really attracted to. Thus you find yourself unyieldingly settling for second best.

Quite unnerving sometimes you may find yourself suddenly shaking and stuttering incoherently when eventually you run into them and decide to finally seize the moment and talk to them; given you have had a crush on them. Worst still, while initially you may have bellowed to yourself and convincingly  that you are going to get them good without faltering whatsoever; only to shamefully find out at the crucial moment that you have suddenly lost your words and thus goofed in front of them.

Additionally, one might find themselves in a good relationship but at some incomprehensible point out of the blues suddenly grow insecure emotionally with the end result of sorrowfully driving their partners away, thanks to feelings of clinginess mixed with self inflicted dose of imagined insecurities. It could be that you are head over heels in love with someone, then at some point you see them with other people and find yourself sailing the turbulent sea of jealousy and misplaced anger about them. Such destructive feelings are triggered by lack of self confidence in you and other people, brought about by nothing but fear. This is a serious social aspect that cripples many individuals effectively rendering them as unsuccessful at partnership building thereby denying them the precious chance of having and enjoying a healthy relationship.

Lack of confidence can open the door to  sickly feelings of self betrayals; leading the individual to painfully struggle just to make their life come through as desired.

Granted, at the opportunity of meeting  people face to face, especially if we deeply adored them may be unwittingly watered down with incontrollable acts of nervousness amplified with the fumbling of words may be quite natural. But if the  triggering fear  is deeply engrained then  the resultant can be  damaging to the individual’s feeling of self worth and  respect.

The bench-mark for successful  attraction of the opposite sex firmly lies in your best self coming  through  shinning even in the face of  nervousness. Perhaps, mixing it with little doses of smiles could go along way in endearing that special someone to you. It therefore calls for an individual’s initiative: staying in control of their feelings as reasonably convincing as possible so that people don’t misconstrue shyness or nervous behavior as a signal of distress to  the effect that they  simply don’t like being around other people.